The one where Karodge saved my life

So I’ve mentioned before my tendency to mildly enjoy being a homebody, yeah? Well that was the case Friday night. Meredith’s family (who I affectionately refer to as the “Duffy’s” were in town. Her mom’s name is Duffy, which is why the name stuck and is also a little pizzazzier than the “Clayton’s”). Anyway, we ate lasagna, played a game, and this girl was in pajamas, ready for bed. Hopeful. I ended up being semi-dragged into going to the Delta Psi house (fave fraternity, also known as “the hall”). After being ridiculed for having diseases I don’t have (Wil), and making fun of Meredith’s Wal-Mart cardigan, someone decided we needed Taco Bell. I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again: College students have a difficult time deciphering between needs and wants. Clearly, this was a need. And, as the driver, I was responsible for responding to my friends’ hunger needs.

Skipping to scene of us in Taco Bell’s parking lot.

Chase insists I jump on his back. He PROMISES he will catch me. He KNOWS he is strong enough. I needed to TRUST him. Okay. Fine. I made sure to make my jump very solid so that I could get enough lift to land myself on his back… until…

Nike shorts the morning after the brain crash.
See dirt as proof of fall. 

Katy. Katy Clayton, that is. Youngest of the Duffy’s, sweet Katy meant no harm in her acts. She came out of nowhere, and jumped on my back while I was in mid air jumping on Chase’s.  This caused Chase to grab and hold onto my legs, Katy to miss my back, and me to fall first on Karodge (the abbreviation of the name “Karodria”, given to my butt by Adam. See also: “Get it, Karodge,” “Those pants make Karodge look huge,” “Karodge’s signature dance move,” etc.), thus slightly breaking the hit of my skull (right Parietal bone to be exact) on the concrete. 

Meredith claims that if it weren’t for her (Karodria), I would be concussioned right now. I choose to believe that I did have a mild concussion for a brief 2 seconds while I tried to regain my connection with the world after the hard hit I endured.  Now, I only suffer from a skull bruise and tender jaw from my teeth clamping together.

Conclusion:

-Katy almost gave me a brain injury, but gave me something to blahg about.

-Taco Bell is not a need.

-You’ve met Karodria.

-I don’t have any diseases.